In case you are wondering, this is all stuff which is coming out of a pre-emptive strike on a mid-life crisis. I'm not going to give in to it man. That pesky mid-life crisis is not going to bring me to my knees. I'm gonna age gracefully. I figure I have ten years before all this stuff comes back for real, when I start to get the urge to date girls ten years younger and seek fast cars and faster drugs.. etc etc. SUBVERT. I am not going to fit in to the stereotype!
Take control of your mid-life crisis.. Pretend you are 40 and that you've got too old, fat and washed out to live.. Imagine sitting in that straightjacket you call a 'leather recliner', reading the Tory press and feeling bad about taxes. Wear cords, man. Wear navy blue Dockers. Buy a Toyota MR2. Do it on credit if you haven't got the budget. Go see your financial adviser, ask about pensions. Talk passionately about 'equity', over a coffee in Cafe Rogue on a Saturday night in your local high street. Pat your gut, with contentment and maybe just a bit of contempt too. Do it now as a pastiche, before you do it for real. You'll feel much better, trust me I'm not a doctor.